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Starting my journey here and now!

by Optimist at Heart on 14 January 2010

Hello - my name is Val, nice to meet you! I am a middle-aged married woman, who has suffered from depression in varying degrees for the last six years. In 2008 I was convinced that I had conquered the "demon" for good, but during the second half of last year I became increasingly aware of symptoms creeping back in. I didn't respond fast enough - believing, as I did, that I was free of depression and was just having the odd "bad day". Hence here I am, back in the depths of despair (exacerbated by menopausal symptoms) and having narrowly escaped completely alienating myself from a beloved circle of online friends ... who currently constitute my ENTIRE circle of friends! I am very fortunate that those dear friends realised something was very wrong with me and are helping me to get through this bad time.

 

But notice my online name ... "Optimist at Heart". A strange name for a depressive? No, I don't think so. Because I believe the vast majority of depressed people are like me - they have, buried beneath the layers of despair, inertia and self-loathing, an innate optimism that WILL NOT die. It may not be very easy to locate, at times, but I think many of us know that there is a wellspring of hope and self-belief somewhere deep inside ... and that is why we keep on fighting this terrible illnes

 

And THAT is the journey I am starting - right here and now - my journey back to self-belief, back to the person I was meant to be, back to ... happiness and joy. Wish me luck!! Val x

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JCR21 said on 15 January 2010

Welcome to the blog Val. I like your message that there exists within us all, including those with depression, a kernel of optimism and belief.

Best wishes

John

 
Caspar said on 15 January 2010

Hi Val,

welcome to the blog! I hope you find sharing your thoughts and feelings here useful.  Looking forward to reading more of your posts!

Caspar

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